Last night my daughter caught me fighting insomnia on the family room couch, in front of a flickering TV..
“Hi, Dad, what’s up?”
“Uhh, I’m trying to get some sleep, Stephanie, its 3 am...”
“Guess what, Jerry and I are going to Great Adventures tomorrow!”
“Well, I guess you guys better get some sleep…..”
“Uhh, Dad, we don’t need any! We’re like so excited, we’re leaving in twenty minutes! “We want to be the very FIRST one’s in line, that would be so Cool!”

Suddenly a 10,000 V jolt of parental anxiety took me from half slumber to full adrenaline awake! Two teenagers with no sleep driving a ratty old banger on the 100mph Turnpike alongside 100 ton tractor trailers the size of office buildings!
“Stephanie, whose car are you taking?” I was terrified.
“Jerry’s. He’s got air conditioning.”
“Oh s___”, I thought to myself. I’d seen Jerry’s car. A Honda Civic with 210,000 miles on it, a worn clutch, bald tires and clickety universal joints, fenders held on with duct tape, and cardboard on a rear window….

My mind raced rapidly, trying to figure out what I had in my motor pool the kids could safely use. The Saab Turbo? No way, Jerry would race it to 150 mph. Besides I was selling it to pay off college tuition. The Volvo 940? No way, we use that on family trips only.
That left the old reliable Mercedes 300D!
The only question mark was that it was in post overhaul condition. I drove it, but that’s because I knew what all the loose wires held together by wire nuts were doing. Also I was working on the sunroof alignment, but who uses that at 4 am in the morning?

The issue was settled! “Take the Mercedes, Stephanie. Just don’t touch any of the loose wires, don’t do anything unusual and the car will be fine.”
“No problem, Dad! Besides Jerry knows a lot about cars!”

It was 7 am when I got the call.
“Dad, uhh we like broke down on the highway one hour ago. The battery is dead.”
“Why didn’t you call me one hour ago?”
“Jerry and I were eating our sandwiches and having a deep conversation about the meaning of Life…”
“That can’t be," I thought. The car had a new battery and a new alternator and I had even run an ammeter to the dash to makes sure the charging system was okay… ..Oh sh___! Jerry had found that wire and disconnected it, breaking the charging circuit.
“Stephanie, did you touch the any of the wires I told you not to?”
“Uhh Dad…Jerry did… he was like looking for 12 Volts so he could charge his IPOD and he found this great hot wire!”
I was totally dumbfounded. “Okay Stephanie, don’t move, I’ll be right there!”

“Uhhh Dad, could you like hustle? Its raining and we got the sunroof wide open and it’s jammed and then Jerry tried to close it and I think he snapped it off the track.”

i am 23 and i am already affraid to let my future kids use my 300D.

that is freakin crazy. i must insert the quote from Tommy Boy:

"That was awesome... but sorry about your car man, that sucks!"

i really want to hear the rest of the story, but i think it will end in grief, over the 300D's condition and over Jerry's dead body.

At this point you buy a 35hp 1965 190D.

I think I would enslave that guy to fixing my car, while I watched. Or in the very least, make him pay for every last cent of damage he did. This is why no one except me or (occassionally) my dad touch my car.

__________________
-diesel is not just a fuel, its a way of life-
'15 GLK250 Bluetec 118k - mine - (OC-123,800)
'17 Metris(VITO!) - 37k - wifes (OC-41k)
'09 Sprinter 3500 Winnebago View - 62k (OC - 67k)
'13 ML350 Bluetec - 95k - dad's (OC-98k)
'01 SL500 - 103k(km) - dad's (OC-110,000km)
'16 E400 4matic Sedan - 148k - Brothers (OC-155k)

Nah. Find a gun, a open field and a deep hole. The initial satisfaction will be worth it.

__________________
Sent from an agnostic abacus

2014 C250 21,XXX my new DD ** 2013 GLK 350 18,000 Wife's new DD**

- With out god, life is everything.
- God is an ever receding pocket of scientific ignorance that's getting smaller and smaller as time moves on..." Neil DeGrasse Tyson
- You can pray for me, I'll think for you.
- When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.

This is the same 300D that caught fire in your driveway, right?


My mum hasn't sat in the driver's seat of my 240D ever since she F___ed up the front left fender while backing it out of the garage.

She paid for the repairs but she's not driving it ever again.

__________________
1982 240D.
My name is Michael, and I am an 18 year old binge-drinkin', cigar-smokin', novel-writin', all around unsavory and unnattractive guy. I tell long-winded stories, and I only shave once a week, although I've had to do it every day since I was 16.

This is the same 300D that caught fire in your driveway, right?

#$^&alwys forgot the Brian Carlton trick

Yes, it is, but its been meticulously rebuilt. It has a new engine, transmission, windshield, dash and wiring harness and some 100 pounds of my sweat in the carpets...

I cringe each time either of my two sons say they want to take my '87. Usually it is because they want to take more people than they can put in their vehicles or for the other wagon function . . . of course if they were thinking they would sugget the VW bus.

The best part is they both appreciate the age factor and have helped me enough to know what works and what is being worked on. They have a healthy respect for my sweat investments . . . and they know their ipods, etc. do not belong in my vehicles since they are supposed to be listening for signs of something going wrong.
Steve

__________________
Steve
'87 300TD - 132K - Soon 4-Sale
'84 300D Turbo - 122K - Driving
'77 VW Type II - 77K - Restored
'08 250EX Ninja
English Bulldog (Brier) - My best friend. Passed away 12/02/04 while in my arms.

You have to find Stephanie a new boyfriend. This one is not working out.

one that knows the meaning of life and someone else's Mercedes?

__________________
Steve
'87 300TD - 132K - Soon 4-Sale
'84 300D Turbo - 122K - Driving
'77 VW Type II - 77K - Restored
'08 250EX Ninja
English Bulldog (Brier) - My best friend. Passed away 12/02/04 while in my arms.

That might be shooting a little high... how about one that can just understand simple instructions " not to touch the wires" .... ?

You should personally charge his i-pod with a spark-plug wire attached to his scrotum.

__________________
1983 300-D turbo
1985 300-D turbo
1959 Harley Panhead chopper
1929 Ford coupe restored
I hang out with Boneheaddoctor at Schuman Automotive OBK#5
All liberals are mattoids but not all mattoids are liberal.

You have a showpiece car, its well restored and tuned, and its got hundreds of hours of your sweat equity in it..and its also your most relaible car...in my case its my SAAB 9000, which looks brand new..your teenager wants to drive to some Concert on a rainy night with her friends and you want her to get their safely, but you know when she gets back, there will be coffee and McDonald's stains on the Carpet, at least one delicate feature broken, not to mention the engine revved to 5 grand, and every cool feature of the car played with like Curious George the Monkey (thats what I call my daughter)...

Whats your answer? take her little banger with its 1.5 liter engine on a turnpike with trucks whose tires ouweigh her car or let them use the SAAB?

My answer "D___, by the way Stephanie, your Grandmom must see you tomoorow, you can't go! She's not getting any younger, you know......"

You guys are scaring me. I have a 14 year old daughter who is already asking me what kind of car I'm going to buy for her. I made the mistake of taking her with me to a MB dealer a while ago and she decided she likes SLs (but only red ones). Last week (while riding on the back of my bike) she decided she really wanted a motorcycle instead, I don't think so. Anyone know any good boarding schools?

"..your teenager wants to drive to some Concert on a rainy night with her friends and you want her to get their safely, but you know when she gets back, there will be coffee and McDonald's stains on the Carpet, at least one delicate feature broken, not to mention the engine revved to 5 grand, and every cool feature of the car played with like Curious George the Monkey (thats what I call my daughter)..."

Richard, you need to get a new daughter, this one is not working out.