We've had a lot of threads about what can be burned in the engine in case there's no diesel available, but what happens if one has an empty crankcase and needs to get going?

These folks suggest that clam chowder and beer are viable alternatives.

Terrible that they tried to kill the diesel, amazing (but not unbelievable) that it weathered their attempts.

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1992 300D 2.5T 249k - Parked with a bad transmission
1981 300SD 142k - Daily driver